I can remember being "younger" and thinking that if I made $60,000 a year, I'd be set for life. I don't need a million dollars (not that I'd turn it down mind you) I just don't need it. I have many "things" and lots of "stuff" so I really don't need more.
However, as an official adult, I am finding the age old truth that the all might dollar is nothing but a wimp. I don't make $60,000 a year, but I do ok- and am grateful for it. My husband, the glamorous pilot- currently makes less than I do. WHAT? Are you astounded? Don't all pilots make over $100,000 a month? I mean really? Well, no... in fact, the average first year pay for a co-pilot/first officer is less than $40,000 a year. And they work like demons for it too.
So to be clear, I am by no means poor and do not mean to act as if I am in the poor house. We have nice things, we have a house etc. and I am grateful for it- truly. But to come to the REAL point of all of this nonsense is this.... How do I ask for a raise? I despise asking people for more recognition.
It's not like I can walk in and say, "Hi! I've been here for 3 years without a non "cola" raise and I think you need to give me more money."
"Why? Oh you want to know why my piece of the pie should be bigger?"
"Um.... because.... umm... Hang on let me think."
Where the problem comes in has nothing to do with money. It has to do with ego and fear. I am afraid to be told, "No. You suck. In fact you should pay us to work here."
I also don't know how to sell myself- Yes I'm good at my job. But really, how on earth am I going to explain what I do and why it's important to your average "bean counter"? Half the people I meet have no idea what my job entails and about a third of those think I just muck about playing dress up.
No, my job is not required to keep society moving. In fact, the arts are often the first thing to go to the guillotine of budget cuts. But my work has value, and it's hard work too. Not just "anybody" can do my job, or my husbands for that matter.
We worked hard for our education. And now we work hard for the money, so hard for the money... (Sorry bad flashback) So we should at least make enough to pay back the student loans that got us here, right? Maybe I should use that as my justification for a raise. "Pay me so I can pay my loans, so you can have more students that can be in debt too!"
Anyhow... I'm lucky to have a department that will support my efforts to increase my piggy bank, I just wish I felt better about asking for it.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Friday, February 08, 2008
An ass out of me and me?
Assumptions and stereotypes are a mental sucker punch. Boy do I feel like an ass...
Yesterday, while standing in line for my prescription at Target, I observe a small family dynamic. Both children, boys, are dress in monochromatic blue. Jeans and serviceable shirts, nothing fancy. No logos or "bad attitude" sayings on their clothes, just two plain but clean boys. With them is their mother. She is wearing very simple black flats with nylons, an ankle lengths moss green skirt, a white button-down collared shirt and matching moss green hip length vest. Her obviously very long hair is pulled back into a severe bun at the nape of her neck. She and her children spoke with an accent, that I could only describe as Eastern European. To my eye, they appeared to be a very strict and simple family. I assumed they were something like Mennonites or Amish. So imagine my surprise when out of her small and plain black purse, Mama pulls out a Blackberry and starts to talk to someone.
Honestly my brain was stuck on stupid for a second- I just couldn't reconcile what I was seeing. But fortunately my brain finally became unstuck and kicked my own ass for being dumb. Just because someone is dressed a certain way does NOT dictate who they are. I should know this very well, considering my profession. I just found my own stereotypes and assumptions to be funny. Makes me wonder what people assume about me? Maybe I shouldn't ask...
Monday, January 14, 2008
Oh- 8?
It's hard to believe that it is now 2008. I can remember when, in the 1990s- oh so long ago- I would imagine the day I turned 24. It would be March of 2000! Wow 2000 and 24, I'd be so grown-up and old.
Needless to say, now I laugh at my naivete. 24 old? I was so dumb at 24, so lost, so confused as to who I was. How can you be grown-up if you don't know your ass from your elbow? Unfortunately, I think I may still need some anatomy lessons. At the grand old age of 31 (32 in March) I am finally starting to sort some things out about my self.
I did not know that I secretly wanted to be a rock star. Can you imagine? Me neither, but it's true. I didn't know that I would really enjoy snowboarding. I do. I really do. I fall down the mountain more often than not, but I still love it. I've also decided something- I want to take race car driving lessons. To some of you that may not be a surprise if you've driven with me, but I found it surprising none the less. I imagine I would giggle the entire time, but I don't care- I feel the need, the need for speed!
Now comes the crux of my situation- #1 I have two small children I should be caring for. I shouldn't be galloping off to relive some missed part of childhood. But... IIIIIIIIIII Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnntttttttttt toooooooooooooo! (Whining didn't work as a kid either- Damn)
#2- I have bills to pay and responsibilities to take care of. Honestly, that will never change so why should it stop me?
But you know what? I'm almost 32 years old and dammit, so what if it's taken me this long to figure some things out? Who says I CAN'T? Me? Well I think I'll just tell myself to stuff it and do these things anyway. So I don't get a record deal- who cares? Look what it did for Brittney- I don't need that circus. So I don't join the winter x-games? I think I'll survive. (I think) So I don't win the Piston Cup? As long as I don't piss my pants I'll be a winner!
Ok- So here goes- my hopes and secret dreams are out in the universe, secret no longer- Let's just see what happens huh? Either way it should be entertaining to watch on video. Maybe I'll make a bundle from my bio-pic on you-tube! Hey, it's a thought.
Needless to say, now I laugh at my naivete. 24 old? I was so dumb at 24, so lost, so confused as to who I was. How can you be grown-up if you don't know your ass from your elbow? Unfortunately, I think I may still need some anatomy lessons. At the grand old age of 31 (32 in March) I am finally starting to sort some things out about my self.
I did not know that I secretly wanted to be a rock star. Can you imagine? Me neither, but it's true. I didn't know that I would really enjoy snowboarding. I do. I really do. I fall down the mountain more often than not, but I still love it. I've also decided something- I want to take race car driving lessons. To some of you that may not be a surprise if you've driven with me, but I found it surprising none the less. I imagine I would giggle the entire time, but I don't care- I feel the need, the need for speed!
Now comes the crux of my situation- #1 I have two small children I should be caring for. I shouldn't be galloping off to relive some missed part of childhood. But... IIIIIIIIIII Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnntttttttttt toooooooooooooo! (Whining didn't work as a kid either- Damn)
#2- I have bills to pay and responsibilities to take care of. Honestly, that will never change so why should it stop me?
But you know what? I'm almost 32 years old and dammit, so what if it's taken me this long to figure some things out? Who says I CAN'T? Me? Well I think I'll just tell myself to stuff it and do these things anyway. So I don't get a record deal- who cares? Look what it did for Brittney- I don't need that circus. So I don't join the winter x-games? I think I'll survive. (I think) So I don't win the Piston Cup? As long as I don't piss my pants I'll be a winner!
Ok- So here goes- my hopes and secret dreams are out in the universe, secret no longer- Let's just see what happens huh? Either way it should be entertaining to watch on video. Maybe I'll make a bundle from my bio-pic on you-tube! Hey, it's a thought.
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
A Christmas Story!
So in the pre-Christmas insanity I found myself doing a ton of driving. Whenever Randy happens to remain local during his work week I make it a point to take the kids to see him. Luckily for us, he was very local the week before Christmas. He was able to come home and see us on Sunday, we went to Burbank to visit him on Monday and finally on Friday, we were able to go to Van Nuys to see him for dinner. That's a lot of driving!
Van Nuys is far. I can't imagine how Randy used to commute there EVERYDAY for a year!! As I was saying, Van Nuys is far, add to that the holiday Friday traffic and... wow! So it took me 2 hours to get there in stop and go traffic- I left Fontana at 2:30! Soo... after the long haul to get there I was NOT looking forward to the slog home.
Randy took us to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and we enjoyed a tasty dining experience. The kids were a bit wound up from the drive but luckily it was a loud restaurant so we didn't make too much of a scene.
So after dinner I decided to delay the insanity and go to.... TARGET!! I LOVE TARGET!!
We bumble around the two story Target for a bit making our various consumer choices; enjoying the scenery of people. And now comes the whole reason for this diatribe...
I pull in to the check out line of choice and observe the two "young ladies" (I hesitate to use such words) before me- Sexy Suzy and Tarty Tricia. Both gals were wearing the oh-so-trendy aka oh-so-trashy ensemble of tight low rise jeans, mid-riff bearing tee, high heel name brand faux suede and fur boots and the quilted short waisted "jacket". Nice. Both gals had the sloppy pony tail and "I just woke up" make-up going on. But wait it get's better....
Sexy Suzy has a very visible tattoo... on her abdomen... It's the hilt of a sword...The blade is.... pointed DOWN!!! Nice.
Ok that alone is a great scenario... IT GET'S BETTER!
Trendy Tricia places her purchases on the belt and asks for two gift card at $100 each- her total was over $300. Hey it's Christmas!
Now... our final player in this mini melodrama is the cashier... Fred aka KingGamer235... Everything about him is round... his head, his belly, his glasses- EVERYTHING. Even the shape of his bald spot is perfectly round.
So Fred informs Tricia of her Grand total of..$369 and she proceeds to pull out a HUGE ROLL of $1 bills. HUGE! Now I don't know about you, but when a "lady" pulls out a grip of ones I assume one of two things... waitress or... stripper. Either way they're here to serve you.
Anyhow... As Tricia starts peeling her onion of ones, Fred, in an attempt to be flirty, asks AND I QUOTE...."Oh! Been to the casino lately?" *Grinning Roundly*
And now for the piece de resistance!!!
She looks up from her concentrated counting and looks at him with the look only an annoyed stripper can give and says, "Yeah".
That's it. Just, "Yeah" and in that one word conveyed everything! TRANSLATION: "Yeah that's it! The casino! Dumbass. I 've seen you sitting in the club a time or two. In fact I think these 5 dollars are yours from the other night."
Wow... really that's all I can say.
Van Nuys is far. I can't imagine how Randy used to commute there EVERYDAY for a year!! As I was saying, Van Nuys is far, add to that the holiday Friday traffic and... wow! So it took me 2 hours to get there in stop and go traffic- I left Fontana at 2:30! Soo... after the long haul to get there I was NOT looking forward to the slog home.
Randy took us to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and we enjoyed a tasty dining experience. The kids were a bit wound up from the drive but luckily it was a loud restaurant so we didn't make too much of a scene.
So after dinner I decided to delay the insanity and go to.... TARGET!! I LOVE TARGET!!
We bumble around the two story Target for a bit making our various consumer choices; enjoying the scenery of people. And now comes the whole reason for this diatribe...
I pull in to the check out line of choice and observe the two "young ladies" (I hesitate to use such words) before me- Sexy Suzy and Tarty Tricia. Both gals were wearing the oh-so-trendy aka oh-so-trashy ensemble of tight low rise jeans, mid-riff bearing tee, high heel name brand faux suede and fur boots and the quilted short waisted "jacket". Nice. Both gals had the sloppy pony tail and "I just woke up" make-up going on. But wait it get's better....
Sexy Suzy has a very visible tattoo... on her abdomen... It's the hilt of a sword...The blade is.... pointed DOWN!!! Nice.
Ok that alone is a great scenario... IT GET'S BETTER!
Trendy Tricia places her purchases on the belt and asks for two gift card at $100 each- her total was over $300. Hey it's Christmas!
Now... our final player in this mini melodrama is the cashier... Fred aka KingGamer235... Everything about him is round... his head, his belly, his glasses- EVERYTHING. Even the shape of his bald spot is perfectly round.
So Fred informs Tricia of her Grand total of..$369 and she proceeds to pull out a HUGE ROLL of $1 bills. HUGE! Now I don't know about you, but when a "lady" pulls out a grip of ones I assume one of two things... waitress or... stripper. Either way they're here to serve you.
Anyhow... As Tricia starts peeling her onion of ones, Fred, in an attempt to be flirty, asks AND I QUOTE...."Oh! Been to the casino lately?" *Grinning Roundly*
And now for the piece de resistance!!!
She looks up from her concentrated counting and looks at him with the look only an annoyed stripper can give and says, "Yeah".
That's it. Just, "Yeah" and in that one word conveyed everything! TRANSLATION: "Yeah that's it! The casino! Dumbass. I 've seen you sitting in the club a time or two. In fact I think these 5 dollars are yours from the other night."
Wow... really that's all I can say.
Sunday, December 02, 2007
A gift for every season!
Have you ever been shopping and seen the perfect gift for someone but weren't quite sure when to give it to them? For example, you find the best Wonder Woman panties ever and just know your dear friend would love them but it's no where near her birthday or Christmas! What to do?
Well, in a effort to help alleviate any extra stress from the lives of my dear fiends, I've decided to come up with a calendar of special events and anniversaries in my life worthy of gift giving. See what a good friend I am? Seriously, what better way to show I care? This list is good for family, friends and especially husbands!
Did I mention.... especially husbands?
January-
Jan 1st- Well I survived another calendar year, I deserve something nice!
February-
Feb 2nd- Groundhog Day- I'm afraid of my shadow too!
Feb 12th - Lincolns Birthday- I love pennies and think they should be a part of US currency- help keep them in circulation!
Feb 14th- Valentine's Day! - What would the poor greeting card companies do with out it! (PS It's my mother's birthday too!)
Feb 17th- Random Acts of Kindness day- Need I say more?
Feb 18th- President's Day- I was the President of Delta Psi Omega!
Feb 22nd- Washington's Birthday- I love dollars too!
March- MY BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!
March 13th- My Birthday
March 18th- The Anniversary of my Tummy Surgery
March 22nd- The Anniversary of my first Poop! (This was a big deal!) I think is should have a party this year! A Pupu party!
April-
Apr 1st- April Fool's Day- Because I am one!
Apr 6th- National Tartan Day- A nod to my inner Bonnie Jean!
April 13th- Jefferson's Birthday- I totally dig nickels!
April 15th- Income Tax Day- I deserve a break
April 22nd- Earth Day- I love the Earth too!
May-
May 2nd- Brother and Sisters Day- I am one and I have some!
Mother's Day- Again- I am one and I have one!
May 18th- My Wedding Anniversary!
Graduation Days!- I Graduated form both Cottey and USC in May. I TOTALLY deserve a cookie for surviving that!
June-
June 8th- Best Friends Day- A holiday for us All! Awesome!
Graduation Days part 2- I Graduated from high school and Cal Poly in June.
June 14- Flag Day- I like Flags
July-
July 4th- Independence Day- I am TOTALLY Independent! (Kind of)
July 23rd- National Hot Dog Day- Duh!
August-
Aug 5th- Sister's Day- I have 2 bio and several non-bio!
Aug 19th- National Aviation Day- My husband is a pilot- I'm a co-member.
Aug 22nd- My 1st Labor day
Aug 23rd- My 1st Birth Day- Abby 2002
Aug 26th- Women's Equality Day- Why not?
September-
Labor Day- Because I have- Twice
Sept 6th- My second Birth day- Alexander 2005- NO PAIN MEDS! ouch
Sept 19th- Talk Like a Pirate Day- Booty! Booty! Booty!
October-
Oct 9th- Leif Erikson Day- Erikson/Erickson... close enough
Oct 13th- The Flood Anniversary- The Flood.
Oct 31st- Halloween- Cause I'm scary!
November-
Nov 3rd- Sandwich Day- Mmm... roast beef on sour dough...
Nov 27th- Thanksgiving- Cream Corn... need I say more?
December-
Dec 1st- "Don't scare the crap out of me Randy!" Anniversary Day
Dec 16th- Boston Tea Party Day- I love tea and parties!
Dec 25th- Christmas
So there it is- in a nutshell- Far too many reasons for "gift" giving- I'm sure I could find more but, I don't want to appear greedy! That would be rude!
I encourage you to look over the year to come and think of all of the opportunities to give to yourself and each other- because a gift,no matter what it's reason, is a blessing. And besides it's so much fun!
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