A Christmas Story!

So in the pre-Christmas insanity I found myself doing a ton of driving. Whenever Randy happens to remain local during his work week I make it a point to take the kids to see him. Luckily for us, he was very local the week before Christmas. He was able to come home and see us on Sunday, we went to Burbank to visit him on Monday and finally on Friday, we were able to go to Van Nuys to see him for dinner. That's a lot of driving!

Van Nuys is far. I can't imagine how Randy used to commute there EVERYDAY for a year!! As I was saying, Van Nuys is far, add to that the holiday Friday traffic and... wow! So it took me 2 hours to get there in stop and go traffic- I left Fontana at 2:30! Soo... after the long haul to get there I was NOT looking forward to the slog home.

Randy took us to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and we enjoyed a tasty dining experience. The kids were a bit wound up from the drive but luckily it was a loud restaurant so we didn't make too much of a scene.

So after dinner I decided to delay the insanity and go to.... TARGET!! I LOVE TARGET!!

We bumble around the two story Target for a bit making our various consumer choices; enjoying the scenery of people. And now comes the whole reason for this diatribe...

I pull in to the check out line of choice and observe the two "young ladies" (I hesitate to use such words) before me- Sexy Suzy and Tarty Tricia. Both gals were wearing the oh-so-trendy aka oh-so-trashy ensemble of tight low rise jeans, mid-riff bearing tee, high heel name brand faux suede and fur boots and the quilted short waisted "jacket". Nice. Both gals had the sloppy pony tail and "I just woke up" make-up going on. But wait it get's better....

Sexy Suzy has a very visible tattoo... on her abdomen... It's the hilt of a sword...The blade is.... pointed DOWN!!! Nice.

Ok that alone is a great scenario... IT GET'S BETTER!

Trendy Tricia places her purchases on the belt and asks for two gift card at $100 each- her total was over $300. Hey it's Christmas!

Now... our final player in this mini melodrama is the cashier... Fred aka KingGamer235... Everything about him is round... his head, his belly, his glasses- EVERYTHING. Even the shape of his bald spot is perfectly round.

So Fred informs Tricia of her Grand total of..$369 and she proceeds to pull out a HUGE ROLL of $1 bills. HUGE! Now I don't know about you, but when a "lady" pulls out a grip of ones I assume one of two things... waitress or... stripper. Either way they're here to serve you.

Anyhow... As Tricia starts peeling her onion of ones, Fred, in an attempt to be flirty, asks AND I QUOTE...."Oh! Been to the casino lately?" *Grinning Roundly*

And now for the piece de resistance!!!

She looks up from her concentrated counting and looks at him with the look only an annoyed stripper can give and says, "Yeah".

That's it. Just, "Yeah" and in that one word conveyed everything! TRANSLATION: "Yeah that's it! The casino! Dumbass. I 've seen you sitting in the club a time or two. In fact I think these 5 dollars are yours from the other night."

Wow... really that's all I can say.